ARCHIVES - 1996 to FOREVER

Luckily, I forget from one time to the next exactly how bad it is when the spasms hit... I don't know if that's because of the pills, or just the same human mental phenomena that allows a woman to have more than one child.

I went to bed last night about 21:00 and went right to sleep.

I woke up about 05:00 and got up to pee... got the spasm when I got up, and again when I lay back down. I had taken a pain pill and a muscle relaxer, but when I awoke at 09:00 I couldn't sit up without excruciating pain.

And my cane was on the floor and I couldn't get it, of course.

Luckily, Karen was up, and I pounded on the wall until she came in to help me.

13:57...
I just took a call that I didn't want to... my friend Jess Roach died yesterday, dammit.

His friend Sydney Grimmit called me, I haven't heard from Sydney since I was in high school, so it was good to hear from him.

Jess has been ailing for years, so his death doesn't come as a surprise... but I was surprised anyway.

He was a good friend, and had been since we were in junior high school at Crane; he lived in Enid, so every time I would go see Mom while she was there we would get together. Usually we would meet at the Red Barn, a sleazy joint about five blocks from where he lived.

I just talked to his wife Brenda, the funeral will be Tuesday, I wish that I could go. This is awfully hard in her, and I would like to be there to support her.

17:35
I think that the pain pills are finally working, up to a point. I'm taking them more frequently than the bottle says, but they weren't working the other way, and that was pretty useless.

But... they are also making me stupid, of course. When I was talking to Brenda, I mentioned that Mom had died... she pointed out that yes, she was at the funeral....

I've tried to do some of the stretching exercises, but when I do, I come really close to setting off a spasm, so maybe tomorrow...

I'm thinking that I need to set the alarm tonight and take the pills every four hours, so that I can get up in the morning without hurting myself.

19:05...
Went out and saw the eclipse in its' final throes... there is something amazing about eclipses; they bring the moon into a three-dimensional idea with the earth and the sun that makes it impossible to not think of reality.

It was too cold to stand out for very long... I came inside and got Karen and in that short time the shadow had visibly moved. I went back in, I've seen many eclipses and there is no reason to get cold watching that tail-end of another one.

It's a whole lot more fun watching one in the middle of the summer laying on the ground on a blanket. With someone that you love, of course.

I had an aborted try at a nap a little while ago... I'm really afraid of laying down when I remember this mornings' experience.

And I've gotta go downstairs and do my pills, dammit. And Karen's fixing something good-smelling for supper....