Don't like that needle? I suppose that the haiku will be like all of the other things that I've tried here... gone in three months, heh. But if I include it in the body of the text, I'm more likely to do it, so there it is. And, of course, if you don't like it, let me know. Hah, like that would ever happen. I know you guys, if you don't like it, you just don't ever come back. Bah, there's plenty more where you come from. Not. I love you all, each and every one. You give my life meaning, 'cause I know that you're there. Well, yeah, my life would have meaning without you, I'm sure, and my life would have meaning without this journal. What am I trying to say here? I still enjoy this, I do. About a month ago, I got a coupla emails that I intended to answer right away, as soon as I could think of something clever and unique to say. Well, that never happened, so I recently sent apologetic emails to the readers when I was going through my inbox and deleting stuff. And I saw those messages sitting there, waiting patiently for my attention, and I thought, I am such a fucking failure, I have mail from people and then they think that I'm too high and mighty to reply to them when I'm only really just dumb and disorganized. And I hope that they'll forgive me, I do. And I really have the same apology to offer anyone whom I've stupidly offended in any way, on-line and off-line. There are some people who I have offended on purpose, of course, and I meant every word of that, every gesture, every nuance, but those people *know* who they are, and they aren't reading this at all. I know. It's the stupid things that I've said and done to people that I love, that's what bothers me. OK, back to today. Hard getting up this AM, and I've been sleepy all day. And work wasn't that busy, either, making it even harder to stay awake. The other 16:30 tech and I both left early, about 16:00, and I stopped and bought some cigars. Yes I did. Shut up. I'm on call this weekend, from 08:00 tomorrow until 15:00 on Sunday, and I know, I know, that will be enough to tip me over the edge. So I'm just giving up early, to save myself from having to worry about smoking for the weekend. Yeah, I should have thought about that sooner, but I didn't. When I got home, Karen told me that the hot water wasn't working in the kitchen. I went downstairs to investigate, and I found the pipes frozen... there were a coupla bricks knocked out of the north wall in the crawl space, and it was cold in the basement, cold enough in the crawl space to freeze the pipes. So I need to go down and get that fixed, and I'm not looking forward to that, 'cause it's cold, cold, cold. And we're supposed to get a foot or more of snow tomorrow, heh. And I'm on call, this should be fun. So, I've gotta get on some warm clothes and go out to the shed and get the roll of insulation that I've got stored out there and then get up in the crawl space and tack it up some way or another. I'll be back later. 19:22 More keyboard progress. I've got to the point that I can figger out all of the chords more or less by trial and error, and I'm a lot more confident about playing. I don't really know if that means anything other than I'm not willing to admit my ignorance, but dammit, I'm having fun. It's still too cold down there to be playing the guitar, though, and I want to put some of my newfound knowledge to the test with the guitar. Now that I know the notes, I want to make them live on the frets, not just on the keys. I was going to check and see where Jody is playing tonight, but I really don't feel like going out, and neither does Karen... I think that she's better, though. Right now, there are two kids here, Brian and Drew. Drew should be going home soon, I'm not sure about Brian, I don't know where Matt is tonight. I was wanting to watch some netflix movies, so we can get those sent back and cease getting them. We haven't been very good about watching movies lately, and it's a waste of money at this point. O'well. A better thing would be for me to just go to bed right now, get warm and sleep, sleep, sleep. For me, sleeping is a sign of depression sometimes, but more often, it's just a sign that I need more sleep. And yeah, I've been taking the meds and they're working. But sometimes it's really hard to tell from inside my head. Miscellaneous haiku: I think I'm OK, but Thank you friends, for being here.
Sorry; necessary protocol.
Your life will be hard.
I got some insulation and packed it into the foundation in the crawl space, and man, it was cold in there. And dirty, and cob-webby too. Now I just have to wait while the pipes thaw out and hope that they haven't split and start leaking.
I have no way of knowing, truly
I rely on my friends.