Nilknarf News

And that's all of the philosophy that you'll get from here on this day.

The kitten, Lucky, isn't mad at me any more, but she misses Sam a lot. She and Sam used to play-fight a lot, and she can't really get Callie to do that... Callie thinks that fighting is done for only one reason... to kill. The kitten is just an irritant, and not worthy of killing just yet.

And I miss Sam a lot too. When there was no other entertainment around, he'd come see me, and we did have some tender, bonding moments.

Callie, though, is still pissed about not being able to go outside. She's in here every five minutes whining about it. I can get her up on my lap and talk to her and she'll settle down, but then again she'll start that looking out the window and whining, whine whine whine.

Pretty amusing, actually.

When I get up to go to the bathroom or to the kitchen, she tears out ahead of my and stands in front of the door, looking up, waiting for the crack between the door and the sill to open up and LET HER OUT!

And, of course, I don't. She's confused, she thought that she had me trained.

I overslept today. Big time.

I shut the alarm off at the first buzz, and then I slept until 06:15... I missed breakfast and taking my BS and I almost forgot to take the trash out.

Cut myself shaving several times, too. I had to take a shower 'cause I didn't before I went to bed and I shaved while I showered... if I have time to do that, I do OK, but I really shouldn't even try when I'm in a hurry... I did get the bleeding stopped before I got to work.

It was a busy day, I ran until 09:00, when the evening guy got there... he came in early since I had a class. And then I went to the class... much better than the after-lunch one yesterday, I managed to stay awake and alert for the whole thing.

I had to go back to work, though, and missed the afternoon segment. I'll miss the afternoon part tomorrow too... we've got a tech off, so we've really only got enough people to run the department when the evening guy comes in early with me being gone. One short = do-able, two-short = impossible.

And it's getting close to time to go to bed... this evening has slipped away. JD called me about an hour ago and we talked for... well, about an hour. He's coming down a week later than I had originally thought, and I'll be on call, but I think that it'll work out OK. He's a neat kid and I love talking to him, we need to at least live in the same state, dammit!

Tyler? Yeah, I love him bunches too. But he never calls. He never writes. But... he will be coming up with JD!

So I'm pretty chuffed about them coming up. The disappointment? Annette, li'l Annette, has to stay at home and go to school.

I got a letter from my doc today... he's gonna give me some extra-strength Tricor to get that nasty triglyceride level down again.

And dammit dammit dammit, the cable is down again.

But before it went down... I bought a Toshiba Pocket PC. About half price. From Tigerdirect.com. And then I bought a bunch of other stuff from them... some memory for my big boy Monster, a coupla cooling fans, several other little bits and pieces.

And then I listened to my phone messages... another job offer, I need to call tomorrow on this one, it sounds really good.

Today's picture is Callie, she really doesn't like my camera at all.

Life is good... it's all good. Uh, OK, I already did say that, heh.

Sometimes I really get bemused by life, and the simple fact that I exist, and that the people that I love exist, even the ones that don't really exist any more. Well, they existed and they loved me as I loved them. I cannot imagine any pain that could ever get my head away from that... Any void that could erase that reality.

And I wonder... what is it within me, that I can maintain such an attitude, when I'm really not that much different from the people that I know who are fatally bitter.

Everything, to these people, is shit, unless it's absolutely perfect. Anything can keep them from having a happy day... anything. I know, I was married to one.

Nothing, absolutely nothing, can keep me from having a good day. Of course, sometimes I can't quite get my head in the right place and I have a crummy day, but I think that I get my head set that way early on... I let circumstances lead me to places that I wouldn't go on my own volition. But I always, always, know what's going on, and when it's over, I do have the ability to laugh.

Having the ability to laugh at ourselves... well, me having the ability to laugh at myself, I guess that I should leave you out of this.... is the one thing... the definitive factor.

Our lives are short, and not always sweet.

Gusto. Like the beer commercial.

You've got to absolutely enjoy life. Because if you don't, you will absolutely hate it.

And that sucks.

Your choice. I've made mine, did that 40 years ago.

It's all good.