I am thinking that probably my sleeping problem is that old bugaboo of mine, depression. Only I really hate to mention it, I hate to because for some reason or another it seems like a cop-out. But of course! I feel guilty for being such a lazy-ass, so I blame it on some silly disease that many people don't even believe exists. Well, I know better, and you know better, too, I think. The world is starting to understand depression a little bit better. On the other hand, there seems to be more and more depressing things in the world... BabyBush, for one, and his henchmen.... That, however, really has nothing, or very little, anyway, to do with depression. I'm a cheerful guy, generally, I always have been. I don't like being sad, I don't like being depressed, and I fight it tooth and nail. But still... still, it clutches me in my dreams, and its talons are sinking into the back of my neck with every awakening. And I want to turn and fight, turn and fight, and I can't move, all I can do is wait for the alarm, and hit the snooze bar and try again and again... to turn and fight, and not crouch snivelling and mewling in the dark corners of my mind. Well, shit. Those of you who know, know, and those who don't can count yourselves among the luckiest of mankind. So... work today sucked majorly. I was there until 18:00, running all of the time. Back hurts, legs hurt, mind hurts. The last patient that I was involved with was an elderly lady with a leaking and dissecting aneurysm.... her chances of survival are slim, but I have seen people in similar circumstances survive, and I hope that she does too. Sometimes ti doesn't take long to get to know someone well, and like and respect them, and this lady was a jewel. Dammitall anyway. Got a new computer today, 2+MZ. It's fast, it is. I like it. In the Mail: On the shelf: