Monday, October 20, 1997 08:13

Ninety hours.

That's how long I lasted. At about 01:00 this morning, I caught one of the security people, Shawn, in the ambulance bay, and talked him out of a cigarette. I was absolutely unable to control myself; and I'm kinda glad that it's over for right now.

Six hours short of four days.

My personal best, so far. And I think that I will do it again, like really soon. I bummed probably ten cigarettes throughout the night, and then I bought a pack on the way home. I don't feel bad about bumming, almost all of the people that I bummed from have bummed from me in the past...

And I don't feel like a total failure, either, like I have in the past. Three days was my goal. Next time my goal will be maybe... six days. Maybe I will double it every time, with a short break in between.

Maybe I'll never try to stop again.

Maybe.... maybe.... shit, I don't know from one day to the next. I am already starting to feel worse from the effects of smoking, though.

Changing the subject.... two more nights to go. Then, eight hours of sleep and a twelve-hour run to Huntsville, TX. I haven't decided whether to take my fishing stuff or not yet. I probably won't, though. On the other hand, maybe JD or Tyler will talk me into it....

Sleep now. More tomorrow, assuming that there is a tomorrow for you... and for me.