I was in an inexplicably good mood tonight for a while until I really thought about it. Really, I should be in a good mood... I have seven days off stretching out ahead of me, five of them with Karen. But that didn't explain it. I had some fun patients tonight, but that wasn't it either. But I was just bubbling with good spirits.
So... What? Get to the point! You say.
In the back of my mind the last few days... has been whisky. No, I don't know why. But I have been (subconsciously, I think) looking forward to being off and getting drunk. I made sure that I had enough cash on me to get a bottle of Jack Black, and I knew where I was going to hide it. Karen isn't off until Friday, so I would have two days alone.
I just don't know where this shit comes from.
And... I thought that, just by writing this down and exposing it, those thoughts would be forced to go away. But they aren't going... the desire is still there. It is there on a conscious level, however, and I can handle that OK. I have no doubts about that. It is just such a hassle to have to deal with that problem again and again... but that's part of it. It never goes away completely.
Probably, when I quit smoking, I will have similar thoughts for the rest of my life. At least, I have every other time that I have quit smoking. Of course, those thoughts were overwhelming... both on the conscious and sub-conscious levels.
Which brings up the tobacco companies' current dilemma: how do you hook kids when you can't target advertising at them? Well, the best way is to expose them to adults who smoke the particular brand that you're selling.
Along those same lines... why not make it illegal for everyone born later than, say, 01 January 1980 (younger than 18, right now) to buy tobacco. That way in twelve years nobody under 30 years old will be able to smoke. In two generations the tobacco problem will be solved!
Yeah, Right!
The recent flooding brings to mind a story: (Thanx to Steve Tonar for this one)
I do hope that we get a couple of clear nights while I'm off, I want to take Karen out somewhere away from the city lights to look at the comet again.
But, according to the weather channel, I probably won't get to do any fishing, it's going to be way too cold and rainy (or even snowy) for me to be out there...
There was an old fella whose house was surrounded by the rising water. Soon, he was completely cut off, and the water was in his living room. A neighbor in a rowboat came by and said, "Hey, jump in the boat and I'll take you to safety!"
The old fella shook his head and said, "The good lord will take care of me."
Well, the water kept rising, and the old fella was forced into his second-floor bedroom. Pretty soon along comes a sheriffs' deputy in a power boat. He saw the old fella and said, "Hey, jump in the boat and I'll take you to safety!"
The old fella shook his head and said, "No, that's OK, the good lord will take care of me."
The water still kept rising, forcing the old duffer onto his roof. A National Guard helicopter came by and threw down a rope ladder to him. "Hey, grab on the ladder and we'll take you to safety!"
Again, the old fella shook his head and said, "No, go on, the good lord will take care of me."
Well, the water rushed over the top of the house, and the old fella drowned.
He arrived in heaven, and leaning against the pearly gates and smoking a cigarette was none other than Jesus Christ. The old fella approached him and said plaintively, "Lord, I thought you were going to take care of me!"
Jesus flipped the ashes off of his cigarette, gave him a contemptuous look and replied, "Dammit, I sent you two boats and a helicopter, what the hell more do you want from me?"